贝克汉姆的摩托车李白诗歌《长干行》多译本赏析-典籍英译研究

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李白诗歌《长干行》多译本赏析-典籍英译研究
“青梅竹马","两小无猜", 这两个洋溢着无限童趣与美好的成语, 聪明的你知道其出处吗? 就来自李白的这首千古名诗: 长干行。

长干行
唐 李白
妾发初覆额,折花门前剧。郎骑竹马来,绕床弄青梅。同居长干里,两小无嫌猜,十四为君妇,羞颜未尝开。低头向暗壁,千唤不一回。十五始展眉,愿同尘与灰。常存抱柱信,岂上望夫台。十六君远行,瞿塘滟滪堆。五月不可触,猿声天上哀。
门前迟行迹,一一生绿苔。
苔深不能扫,落叶秋风早。八月蝴蝶黄,双飞西园草。感此伤妾心,坐愁红颜老。早晚下三巴,预将书报家。相迎不道远,直至长风沙。
【原诗欣赏】
《长干行》是李白反映妇女生活的杰出诗篇,为李白初游金陵时所作,时间在唐玄宗开元十三(725年)秋末之后不久。长干,地名,今江苏省南京市中华门外秦淮河南。 乐府旧题有《长干曲》,郭茂倩《乐府诗集》有五言四句,写一位少女驾舟采菱的情景。另崔颢《长干曲四首》,崔国辅《小长干曲》。
该诗以长居长干里的船家女子的自述口吻,叙述其从青梅竹马至天各一方爱情历程,倾吐对远方丈夫之殷切思念,成功塑造一位感情丰富、感人至深的典型的中国古代少妇形象,颇具艺术感染力。
诗人运用鲜明的形象进行典型概括,向我们展开一幅幅生动鲜明的画面。开头6句,婉若一组民间孩童嬉戏的风情画卷;“十四为君妇”以下8句,通过心理描写生动细腻地描绘了小新娘出嫁后的新婚生活;接下来俞流传 ,更以浓重的笔墨描写闺中少妇的离别愁绪,诗情到此形成了鲜明转折;“门前迟行迹”以下8句,通过节气变化和不同景物的描写,将一个思念远行丈夫的少妇形象,鲜明地跃然于纸上;最后两句则体现李白特有的浪漫主义色彩。
该诗不少细节描写颇为突出,极富艺术效果。如“妾发初覆额”以下几句,写男女儿童天真无邪的游戏动作,活泼可爱。“青梅竹马”成为至今仍在使用的成语单麒汶青 。又如“低头向暗壁,千唤不一回”,写女子初结婚时的羞怯,非常细腻真切。诗人注意到表现女子不同阶段心理状态的变化,而没有作简单化的处理。再如“门前迟行迹,一一生绿苔”,“八月蝴蝶黄,双飞西园草”,通过具体的景物描写,展示了思妇内心世界深邃的感情活动,深刻动人。
如此鲜明生动之意象,博得西方意象派诗人庞德及许渊冲、赵彦春等中外翻译大家之青睐,争相译为英文,始有我们今天的语言与音韵的时空穿越盛宴:

【译文欣赏】
1. Ezra Pond 艾兹拉·庞德 译
The River-merchant's wife: A Letter
While my hair was still cut straight across my forehead
I played about the front gate, pulling flowers.You came by on bamboo stilts, playing horse,You walked about my seat, playing with blue plums.And we went on living in the village of Chokan:Two small people, without dislike or suspicion.At forteen I married My Lord you.I never laughed, being bashful.Lowering my head, I looked at the wall.Called to, a thousand times, I never looked back.At fifteen I stopped scowling,I desired my dust to be mingled with yours.Forever and forever and forever.Why should I climb the look out?At sixteen you departed,You went into far Ku-to-en, by the river of swirling eddies,And you have been gone five months.The monkeys make sorrowful noise overhead.You dragged your feet when you went out.By the gate now, the moss is grown, the different mosses,Too deep to clear them away!The leaves fall early this autumn, in wind.The paired butterflies are already yellow with AugustOver the grass in the West garden;They hurt me. I grow older.If you are coming down through the narrows of the river Kiang,Please let me know beforehand,And I will come out to meet youAs far as Cho-fu-Sa.
埃兹拉·庞德(Ezra Pound),美国诗人和文学评论家,意象派诗歌运动的重要代表人物。代表作:
《在地铁站内》(In a Station of the Metro):
The apparition of these faces in the crowd(这几张脸在人群中幻影般闪现)
Petals on a wet, black bough(湿漉漉的黑树枝上花瓣数点)
庞德根据东方诗歌研究者芬诺洛莎的遗稿翻译了一批中国古诗,李白的《长干行》便是其中之一。由于庞德不懂汉语,其翻译多有不准确之处,但却很富有诗意,因此可以说是根据原诗精神进行的一种再创作。汉语的双关语,如“青梅竹马”,的确很难用英语表达;而典故在译成英文时,如果意译罗丝·麦高恩 ,则会失去其原来的风貌,而直译则需要作很长的解释,也很难处理,如“常存抱柱信,岂上望夫台。”另外,中国古诗中人称代词的省略也造成理解上的一些歧义。因此,读者似乎不应过于拘泥庞德翻译的准确性,而应看到他对传播中国文化所作的贡献。
(李公昭主编,新编美国文学选读:英、汉对照,西安交通大学出版社,2000年02月第1版,第327页)
他的意象派作品汲取了日本诗歌如俳句(haiku)诗的形式与特点。他不太懂中文,他的译作是由日译本转译的。所以有些地方他翻译地挺有趣,如“感此伤妾心,坐愁红颜老”,庞德翻译为:”They hurt me. I grow older. “多么简单,直白,interesting。

2. W. A. P. Martin 译
A SOLDIER’S WIFE T0 HER HUSBAND
’Twas many a year agoHow I recall the day!When you,my own true love.Came first with me to play.You rode a bamboo horse.And deemed yourself a knight.With paper helm and shieldAnd wooden sword,bedight.Thus we together grew,And we together played—Yourself a giddy boy,And I a thoughtless maid.At fourteen I was wed;And if one called my name,As quick as lightning flash,The crimson blushes came.
’Twas not till we had passedA year of married lifeMy heart was knit to yoursIn joy to be your Wife.Another year,alas!And you had joined your chief;While I was left at home,In solitary grief.When victory crowms your arms,And I your triumph learn,What bliss for me to flyTo welcome your return.(吕叔湘,中诗英译比录,上海外语教育出版社,1980年,第113页)
3. 裘小龙 译
Changgan Song
With my hair first covering my forehead,
plucked the flowers in ftont of the door,
And you came on the bamboo horse,
playing green plum catch around the bed .
Living in the same Changgan Lane,young, we were innocent .
At fourteen, I married you.
Still too shy,
I hung my head low to the wall
and turned back only at your repeated calls.
At fifteen和玉种田记 , my face lit up in your company;
I was willing to have my ashes mixed with yours.
You were as faithful as the legendary lover
standing steady against the rising tide,
Little did I think I would mount the Husband一Watching一Plateau.
At sixteen, you traveled far away, sailing across the Qutang Gorge,
The Yanyu Crag jutting out so dangerously in the summer,
and monkeys crying sadly in the high mountains ,
The footprints you left, step by step, by our door,
were moss-covered.
The moss too deep to be swept away,
leaves falling in the early autumn wind.
Now the butterflies, yellow in September,
fly in pairs over the grass in the west garden.
The scene breaks my heart, I grow old worrying about you.
Oh when you are coming back through the Three Ba Area,
write a letter home.
I will come out to meet you
as far as Changfengsha.
"当他还是一个中国公民时,他因为他的诗歌创作以及对艾略特与其他英美诗人的翻译而获奖;稍后,当他成了美国公民时不良龙王 ,又因为他的英文诗歌和小说获奖。在我看来,这部集子中的“长干行”足以媲美艾兹拉·庞德那首确应享有盛名,却译得不那么忠实的的“河商的妻子”。这些译诗无论在语言或比喻上都有一种清澈度,也有微妙的节奏。裘小龙更有一个诗人的第六感,知道在需要时(偶尔)怎样用一个不那么直接而更令人联想的词联林珍奇,使一行译诗得以升华,我们因此免于一些早期中国诗歌翻译的平淡无味。这是一本丰富的翻译诗集,来自我们的“重要的陌生人”中国,更是爱情诗歌中备受欢迎的新篇章。"
---美国桂冠诗人摩那·范·丹(Mona Van Duyn)(裘小龙编译,中国古典爱情诗词选,上海社会科学院出版社,2003年08月第1版,第2页)
4. Arthur Sze 译
Song of Ch’ang-kan
When my hair just began to cover my forehead,
I was plucking flowers, playing in front of the gate.
You came along riding a bamboo stick horse,
circling and dirowing green plums
Together we lived in Ch'ang - kan Village,
never suspicious of our love.
At fourteen, I became your wife, my shy face never opened.
I lowered my heed , faced the dark wall,
to your thousand calls, never a response.
At fifteen, I became enlightened,
was willing to be dust with you, ashes with you.
Always preserving you in my heart,
why should I ascend the terrace to look for your return?
At sixteen, you traveled far,
Through Chu-T'ang Gorge, by rocks and swirling waters ?
And in the fifth month, they are impassable,
monkeys wailing to the sky ?
By our door where you left footprints,
mosses, one by one, grew over;
Too deep to be swept away! Leaves fall early in the autunm wind.
In lunar August, yellow butterflies
hovered in pairs over the west garden grasses .
My heart hurt at this sight , beauty fllckering ?
Sooner or later, if you retum through the Three Pa district,
send home first.
I will meet you重生之80后 , ignore the long distance, even to Long Wind Sands.

5. 王玉书 译
A Merchant Wife’S ComplaintWith hair just hanging about my forehead,I plucked flowers and played before my home gate.You came riding a bamboo in a horse’s stead.Round the bed we played green plums, quite elate.In the some Changgan neighbourhood lived we,Two children,simple-minded and carefree.
At foudeen I was married,your wife to be.I felt shy, to smile seemed too hard for me.Lowering my head,I would face the dark wallsAnd wouldn't turn round at your repeated calls.I didn't feeI at ease till I was fiffeen,And swore:Alive or dead,we would ne’er pa rt.You were hoped to be faithfuI as you’d been.But alas,a lonely Iife I had soon to start.When I was sixteen,far away you were gone,Passing Qutang Gorge where Yanyu Sands lie,
Dangerous,in the fifth moon to be touched on,With monkeys‘ wails echoing to the sky.Before the gate your footprints along the wayHave all been covered by moss thick and green,Too o’ergrown indeed to be swept away.In autumn wind,trees soon leafless have been.In eighth moon, often fly yellow butterfliesIn pairs over the grass of our west garden.My head aches when on them I set my eyes,To think I’II get old soon makes me sadden.
When you are going home through the Three-Ba,Please write to me a letter beforehand.I'II go to meet you, be it e’er so far,Be it,let me suppose,the Long Wind Sand.
(王玉书译诗,王译唐诗三百首 汉英对照,五洲传播出版社,2011.04,第49页)
6. 许渊冲 译
BALLAD oF A TRADER'S WIFE
My forehead barely covered by my hair,Outdoors I pluck’d and played with flowers fair.On hobby horse you came upon the scene;Around the well we played with mumes still green.We lived, close neighbors on Riverside Lane,Carefree and innocent,we children twain.At fourteen years when I became your bride,I'd often turn my bashful face aside.Hanging my head,I'd look on the dark Wall;I would not answer your call upon call.I was fifteen when I composed my brows;To mix my dust with yours were my dear vows.Rather than break faith, you declared you’d die.
Who knew I'd live alone in tower high?I was sixteen when you went far away,Passing Three Gorges studded with rocks grey,
Where ships were wrecked when spring flood ran high.Where gibbons’ wails seemed coming from the sky.Green moss now overgrows before our door;Your footprints, hidde, can be seen no more.Moss can’t be swept away, so thick it grows,And leaves fall early when the west wind blows.In yellow autumn butterflies would passTwo by two in west garden o’er the grass.This sight would break my heart and I'm afraid,Sitting alone, my rosy cheeks would fade.O when are you to leave the western land?Do not forget to tell me beforehand!I'll walk to meet you and not call it farE’en to go to Long Witld Sands where you are.
(许渊冲编,唐诗三百首 汉英对照,贝克汉姆的摩托车高等教育出版社,2000.08,第135页)
许先生译文传神生动,韵律优美,不愧为美化之艺术隐婚市长,采用五步抑扬格,押英雄双韵(Heroic couplet)。

7. 赵彦春 译
Long Stem LaneNew fringe covering my forehead,I plucked a flower to gate-nigh play.You galloped a bamboo horse hereAround the well with a plum spray.
We lived in the same Long Stem Lane慧深法师 ,Both naive, free of craft and guile.At fourteen I became your wife,Too abashed to put on a smile. I bent my head to the corner,Not turning back for all your call. At fifteen, I could spread my browsAnd would live with you, sharing all. I oft believed in devout faith,And would ne’er climb Gaze-for-man-mound. At sixteen, I saw you off thenTo sail for Qutang’s Boulder Round!
Fifth moon, the reef should be kept off; The monkeys scream toward the sky.
The trace you left on the doorwayHas been tinged with moss by and by.The moss is too deep to sweep off,And leaves fall with the sough, alas.Eighth moon, butterflies turn yellow;Two fly to West Park, o’er the grass.At this I cannot but feel sad,Sitting there, old, older I grow.
Whene’er you come back home from Ba,Send me a letter,驰星周 let me know. The long long way I can well stand;I will meet you at Long Wind Sand.
赵老师译文也是很好的学习榜样:通篇采用8音节四步抑扬格,整体押偶行韵,四行一换,节奏明快。最后两行押英雄双韵体( Heroic couplet)很好体现了李白特有的豪气。此外该译本体现出译者的功底,用词丰富清新,表达灵动自然,很值得学习。
8. 拙译 张俊锋
Version 1.To the Tune of Changgan(A tune of stories about the females in boatman families)My forehead fresh fringed with my hair,I plucked flowers, playing by the gate.Then on a "horse" bamboo you came,Round th'well we playing Green-plum-catch Game.We shared Lane Changgan as play mate,A intimate pair, pet and fair.At fourteen your wife I became,And never beamed being too shy.Head drooped to dark walls, like untame,Called and called, I cast back no eye.At fifteen shyness I o'ercame,'N would fain love you till seas go dry.My faith unfailing in your name,Why climb Mt. Watch Husband (Wangfu) should I!At sixteen you parted to forgeFar to the treach'rous Qutang Gorge.You'd clear Reef Yanyu safe in May'Mid sky-scraping ape whines, I pray.Your lingering footprints by the gateAre all shrouded with moss dark green,Too deep to sweep thoroughly clean,Leaves falling in th' wind earlier-date.August gold butterflies in pairsFly o'er the grass in Garden West.To hurt me such a sight's the best;
I, sitting, sigh my fading fair.Whene'er from Three-Ba down you come,Write in advance a letter home.I'll come to meet you howe'er far,Even as far as Chang Feng Sha.(alias Wind Sand Forever).
拙译力求在意义忠实的基础上,以诗译诗余则成是谁 ,试用四步抑扬格,韵式为:整体采用8音节,4步抑扬格,韵式为: 1-6 abccba 7-14 cdcdcdcd 15-18 eeff 19-26 bggb ahha 27-30 iijj
后面第二版会再尝试采用赵老师的偶句韵式,并且前20行偶行押同韵,后10行偶行换韵到底,以还原原诗的风貌,因为,正如汪先生所言,形式本身就是意义。
最后,欢迎各位提供更多译本,一起探讨,也请各位多提宝贵意见!